My spot to share my MS experiences and hear your MS experiences. My wife has been FIGHTING MS for 18 years and we have been married for 17 years. We have been through everything MS has to throw at us. I am my wife's biggest fan and cheerleader. This blog is my way to encourage those who are caretakers and those fighting MS. If you have a moment visit www.msfightclub.com.
Thursday, November 21, 2013
Who supports you in your MS battle?
Everyone needs someone in their life that supports and encourages them. For the MS fighter it is a must. In most cases MS is more than someone can handle on their own. Having a support system is critical and not just for the physical needs (if there are) but the emotional needs. If you are a care partner you need to be the "go to" person for your MS Fighter. They need to know they can count on you every time. Do you have that rock-solid dependable person in your corner?
The fight with MS is much more than the physical symptoms. There are emotional and physiological components that are unseen but I would consider the far greater challenge for most MS fighters. The challenge for the care partner or support people is how to recognize the unseen issues. Let's use depression as an example. It is unseen and if not treated can become a beast. How do you recognize if an MS fighter is depressed and especially if they do not say anything about it? For me it is recognizing changes in behavior. More eating, less eating, more time spent sleeping and emotions are all at the surface. For Jenn these are small changes not wild mood swings and you have to really know the MS fighter to pick up on these changes. As a support person or support people you have to be dialed in on your MS fighter. Recognizing the small changes is critical. By recognizing the small changes you can get a quicker handle of what is going on but more importantly it shows your MS fighter that you do pay attention and it really matters.
What does it mean to an MS fighter to have that person or people that will be there regardless of the situation? The clear answer it means everything to the MS fighter. I put myself in her shoes mentally and think about how I would feel or what I would do if I was given the challenges with MS. The thought of not having a support person or people is frighting. Most MS fighters (especially the ones who are unable to work) deal with issue of isolation regardless if they have a support person or people. When I think about dealing with isolation and not having a support person or people that would make me feel like I was on a very small island by myself in the middle of the ocean.
If you are the care partner or support team always be prepared and be flexible. These two attributes are very important. Be prepared because you never know what is coming. Even if your MS fighter is relatively symptom free you still need to be prepared. Enjoy the time of good health but know that it can change and it can happen quickly without warning. By being prepared and mentally ready if or when there is a downturn in your MS fighters health you can step up and do what is needed. If you are not prepared and a downturn hits you both are dealing with the changes and everybody is struggling. I say be flexible because things change. For example let's say you made plans to meet friends for their kids birthday party at the park. You get a card and gift and you're ready to go. The weather is supposed to be a sunny 75 degrees and but the forecast was wrong and it is 10 degrees hotter and humidity spiked too. Not good for most MS fighters. You have decision to make. One choice is to call your friends and let them know you cannot make it. Or you go the party knowing it there will be a limited time spent there. More than likely your MS fighter won't want to cancel or alter plans because they don't want their MS to dictate what they do when they do it. It is a great attitude but sometimes the tough decisions are put onto the care partner or support people that is best for the MS fighter. Be prepared to always make the best choice for your MS fighter and be flexible.
This subject is much bigger and deeper than a blog post. I wanted to least get some information out there that may be useful. If you are an MS fighter please know you are not alone. If you have local resources like a National Multiple Sclerosis Society chapter close by then use it. There are a lot of people out there cheering for you to beat the MonSter! You can email me at info@msfightclub.com and myself or Jenn will get back to you depending on the need. It is far too important to have support and understanding and the thought of even one MS fighter that does not have that is unacceptable to me.
As you can see below I finally was able to ad a comment box. For those who don't know this is my first blog I have done so I have a learning curve. Please feel free to comment, share or whatever!
If you have not visited my wife's blog please do so at www.battlingthemonster.com. She provides her experience and information as a MS fighter.
Next post: Be thankful.
Thank you for reading.
-Brent
Reject Defeat
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